With Lori's support, I have decided to formally announce my campaign intentions. We need to change the alphabet, and I feel I have the experience to head such changes.
First, and most important: the letter w (double-u). It's name is horribly inappropriate, for three main reasons:
-It is the only letter of the alphabet with more than one syllable.
-There is no "w" sound in the word.
-Most people write "w" with two V's, not U's.
I propose we call it "wee", to go with the general them of the alphabet (bee, see, dee). Other possibilities include "wo" and "why" (which would require renaming Y, which would be logical since "weye" has no Y-sound in it).
Second, the letter H (aitch). Such a harsh word for such a smooth letter! And it has no "h" sound in it. I propose "hee" instead.
For the long term: abolish the letter C. Both sounds are covered by S or K. Actually, let's just change it to the "ch" sound. It is now the letter "chee". "church" can now be spelt "curc". Think of all the letter space we are saving!
Also on my list:
Abolish the font "comic sans". It is acceptable ONLY in comics. Not for file labeling systems. Not for memos. Not for emails.
Who's with me?
Laptop Stop
1 hour ago
6 comments:
As official co-sponsor of the alphabet improvement campaign, I vouch my thorough support of the changes.
Some of you may be concerned about what will happen to the alphabet song, since W has such a prominent, 3-syllable spot at the end. No worries, this has been addressed. Instead of saying "double-u, X, Y and Z", the song can end "wee and X, Y and Z" instead. It's an easy fix.
"Wee" is a terrible name for W. I bet if someone looked into the corporate accounting for the official alphabet improvement campaign, they'd find Nintendo. I'm gonna go start a blog about that right now.
Comic sans must go.
I suggest we all move to the African "click and snap" dialect.
ME! ME!
add papyrus to the "overused fonts list"
I would like to offer my support in the changing of the alphabet. As a graphic designer I also wholeheartedly support the banning of Comic Sans, Papyrus, Times New Roman, Arial and Brush Script.
www.bancomicsans.com
I can't in good conscience support this assult on our alphabet. The letters? The sounds? Maybe. But Papyrus?? Comic Sans? Abolished? Not on my life! Those are some of my favorite fonts (and I don't care if they're overused- hrmph!)
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